Saturday, August 27, 2016

Time to Shut it Down (visitors) - Aug 27th

Very tough day today. We have made a decision that visits are no longer able to happen. Beth has been asleep for 2 days now. She is not eating or drinking and is not very responsive when we try and wake her. She has a hard time communicating or keeping a train of thought. I hope you all can understand that we need the time we have left (especially time when she is alert and awake) to be with family.


For those out of state that were trying to come visit Beth soon, please consider replacing a visit now with a trip out for the funeral services. They will be held in Kirtland at the Stake Center.  


For our local friends, we can’t thank you enough for all of the time spent and love you have given Beth. Beth had three visitors today and none of them were able to talk to Beth as she never woke up. Visitors have been a source of anxiety and concern for Beth lately. The last 3 or 4 days Beth has been very anxious knowing that people were going to be coming over and that she would feel the need to be awake or converse.  We have decided to take that stress off her plate and shut down all visitors.  


Lastly, I just looked on Beth’s phone and she has not replied to a single text since early Wednesday (and even on Wednesday she only replied to two people). I just wanted to let you all know so that no one gets offended that she is not responding.  


Today I made it a point talk to each kid one on one and let them know that time is short. Lots of tears but all of the conversations went well. I am going to let the kids decide if they want to stay home from school this week and be with their mom.  

Tough conversations are much easier while eating a Swenson's Burger




















I remember asking Dr T. a few months ago what to expect the last few days before Beth passes.  She said, Beth will sleep more. She won’t be able to communicate much.  She will not want to eat or drink and she will become very weak.  She will basically fade away.  I hate that I see that this is what is happening.  


On Wednesday, after her panic attack because she couldn’t breathe, I told her that I am not ready for her to pass.  I asked her if she was ready and she said, “Some days I think I am”.  


When Lily and I were talking tonight, she said, “Dad, I don’t want you to get remarried.”  I asked why not. She said, “You don’t need to, you have me.”  Oh boy, did I ever lose it.  

Man this sucks.


32 comments:

Unknown said...

I am so sorry you all are in pain. I pray Beth is just gathering her energy from such a great visit from her friends and that you all will have more time. It is too soon for a wonderful woman to leave the family she has built. Prayers and love sent your way.

Johnathan and Mackenzie said...

Love you Alan. Enjoy the final moments. You have all of us too. Give Beth a forehead kiss from the Brandon Family.

Ratrout said...
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Ratrout said...

All we can do is pray for comfort and strength. Your family had endured too much. Much love to your family.

Lee said...

Oh Alan, my heart hurts for you. We love you so much. Praying for you and sending love. You have the best kids. ❤️ And they're so much like their mom. Our prayers are with you.

stalker sarah said...

My heart breaks for all of you. I continue to pray constantly for comfort and peace and for Beth not to be in pain. Your kids are amazing. Beth is amazing. All of you are amazing. Love you guys so much! 💗

Kylie said...

Sending prayers your way. Love you guys!

hales said...

We love you all. Hugs and prayers.
David and Melody Hales

LuLuBear said...

Big hugs and loves from us in Chicago. Cherish the family time and the togetherness - you are all such strong sources of support for each other and all of us around the Earth embrace the Mowrey family with our loving arms. Love you guys xo Lindsay

Linda Burch said...

So sorry Alan, all of you are in my prayers and my heart aches for all of you.

Unknown said...

Alan!!!!! Tears are streaming down my face as I read this. You and Beth are the most amazing people I have ever known. I am praying for you all, sending love and hugs.

vicki said...

Just heartbroken!

Laura said...

Oh sweet Beth. It sounds like she is comfortable as she sleeps which Is a blessing. These last precious moments conversing and sharing memories around Beth's bedside will forever be a sacred memory for you and your children. I'm sure you can feel the presence of those from the other side attending to Beth and waiting to welcome her home. My love is with you all.

I remember Beth talking about you on the mission- you were her really great 'friend' but I knew it was more because Beth had a twinkle in her eye when she spoke of you. I remember that picture of 'when it all began' and it was fun to see it when you posted it recently. I also remember a fun little shopping spree right before Beth returned home because you had given her a credit card for 'emergencies'. Every girl knows a black French handbag and a new Bulgary watch are 'emergencies'. She even bought me a suede jacket as I was returning home soon to which I mailed off a check returning the funds. It all began so long ago and you created a beautiful life with those four little darlings. Much love to you all.

Tammy said...

You are all in our thoughts and Prayers❤ may God give younger strength you need for next level of Beth's journey.

Jessica Carmen said...

Sending love! 💙

Vicki Crum said...

Praying for you, and loving you all.

Anonymous said...

I do not know your family personally, but being in the Kirtland stake, I feel like I do. Your family is in my prayers. Reading your blog has given me such strength and a greater knowledge of our Heavenly Father's plan.

kate said...

I don't want this for you guys, for anyone. I've maybe talked about my mom's last days with two people. The mixture of emotions seems impossible to bear. But I know you all can do it. Because you're strong and you're together.

Lily's comment, though. I know exactly how she feels. I still feel it.

Katie said...

Alan I can't even begin to imagine what you, the kids and Beth have been going through with this whole ordeal. But you have give all of your friends, family and your kids a gift by just maintaining this blog and keeping it positive and upbeat. You are an amazing person and you two were perfect for each other. Enjoy your last moments but believe you will be together again one day when all the pain of this will be gone. Xoxo Katie

Becky Egger Chahine said...

So much love and prayers being sent. My heart aches for all of you. May God bless you and keep you strong and comforted.

Anonymous said...

My heart is hurting for you all. While cancer can be a beautiful gift it also comes with harsh realities. You are a strong family!! You will endure this well. And we will all be here supporting you and praying for you. We love you!! 💗💗

Unknown said...

Dear Mowrey family, how much my heart aches for you. Im sending all of my love to you. I'm so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father that has given us a way to be together again. Your sweet family will have eternity after this brief separation. Love, love, love you!

Robert said...

Alan and Beth,
I'm praying that your family still has many precious moments of peace and love together in the coming days. I have been deeply touched by your strength, and I suspect that there are a great many who you will never even know what a great impact you have on. I haven't been a frequent commenter, but knowing both of you makes me want to be the best person I can. Thank you for your tremendous example. Love you! #thebetheffect #battletogether

Robert said...
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Unknown said...

Love and hugs and Reiki blessings have been sent to you all. You are all being held.

Jtfahn said...

Prayers for your sweet family. May you feel Heavenly Father's love constantly. This is a sacred time for your family. Just went through this with my mother. My heart hurts for you.

Abby said...

So many emotions as we read this post. Our family continues to pray for your Family's comfort through this time. We love you all though we know you very little but are so grateful for all of your examples of faith, family, devotion and love! Our hearts ache for you but we are thankful for eternal families as we #battletogether with you Beth and the kids.
Love,
Andy and Abby Stearns

Anonymous said...

Not "Mom" still working on that!
The comments above are all echoing my thoughts and feelings to a tee. There really should be "like" or "Amen" buttons. There really are no adequate words to convey how I feel, and how tender my feelings are for you, Alan, and Beth and your family. My love and prayers for you all, Neal and Nan, Christi and David and your families. May our Heavenly Father continually hold you, comfort you and give you all the strength
and blessings that He knows you need to carry you through this unspeakably difficult time. I love you so much and wish I was there to offer some type support and comfort. Cathy Smart

Tracee said...

I had your family on my mind today. I don't check Facebook on a regular basis, I just got on to check in to see how Beth was doing and I found this beautiful and heart wrenching post!!!! I will always be grateful I had the opportunity to know Beth and your beautiful family, even if it was only for a short time! Beth left a lasting impression on me! Your whole family has! She taught me so much!!! We are sending our prayers, our love, and our faith your way! We love you guys and think the world of you! Thank you for your example of endurance, faith, and love!!!! May Heavenly Father be by your side during this impossible time!!!! We love you!

EMG said...

We were friends for a short time in Minneapolis and I appreciated getting to know your family a bit with your oldest boy and girl similarly aged to our oldest boy and girl. Thanks for your Rainforest cafe connections then. I've appreciated your sharing your beautiful family and life's adventures and now for opening your hearts at these tender moments to let us see your depths of love, faith and pain. Prayers for your family. Emily and Darren Gibby fam

Logan and Ashley said...

My heart so aches for you and your family. I pray that these last moments with Beth give you and the family sweet memories.

Lauren Grik Persall said...

Sending much love & prayers from California and truly take this time for you and the kids to embrace these moments. Please give Beth a huge hug and kiss.